With the oversaturation of opinion on the internet, what’s the harm in throwing one more into the void?

Golf course rankings are the fodder of choice for golf tragics like us. Disenfranchised from whatever real priorities we should be tending to, we instead find ourselves doomscrolling through numbered lists, getting irrationally upset that one course is ranked higher than another. A course we’ve played once suddenly becomes a hill we’re prepared to die on. But what does this say about the rankings themselves?

The unfortunate truth is, rankings matter. Economically, they’re critical to the survival of many golf courses. They’re the weird, slightly embarrassing marketing monster we’ve all helped create. Placing courses like Cape Wickham in a compromised position. A stunning, remote golf course built in the middle of Bass Straight, and hanging on to every great ranking it gets as it survives on tourist dollars and list chasing fiend. The very top of the rankings will always be hogged by the usual suspects, basking in the compounding glow of historical success. But at the opposite end of the list, for some of our beloved battlers, it’s a knife fight for relevance.

So yes, I hate rankings. I also become irrationally upset over them. It’s a maddening contradiction — to reject the whole idea of a pecking order, while also caring deeply whether a course I love (or loathe) has moved up or down three spots. It’s our right, as golf course tragics. We live this madness. So, why not go one step further?

Let’s rank the people who rank the courses...

Is this helpful? No.
Is it fair? Also No.
Did I enjoy putting it together? Not particularly.
But here it is anyway.

Ranking Dog Friendly Golf Courses would be as close as I would come to do a ranking…

8. UK Golf Guy + Australian Golf Passport Podcast
There isn’t enough data to really assess this one, but I’m including it because they’re influential and likable and I need to fill out my rankings to the even number. That said, has DJ ever played a course below a 13 rating in Australia? I’d love to see him grind it out somewhere truly average just to calibrate the system. DJ, the floor is yours.

For Matty & Scowarrrr we wait in anticipation!

7. Planet Golf – Community Rankings
Turns out, a surprising number of this community has played Ellerston. Enough to rank it 6th in the country, apparently. I haven’t had the privilege, but I’m skeptical. The cult of privacy seems to influence a lot here, and a few other courses are ranked in ways that defy logic. Amusing, yes. Trustworthy? Less so.

6. GolfLux
After calling out New South Wales bias in other rankings, GolfLux has zagged and gone full Victoria. Their “Top 15 Australian Courses” waits until number 11 to mention a non-Victorian layout. The list is short, which is refreshing, and the title is strangely captivating. But the actual rankings? Laughable. Good entertainment value though, and maybe that’s the point. Dammit.

PS: Peninsula not Peninsular

5. Australian Golf Digest
Offended might be too strong a word, but I’m not thrilled. The exclusion of RACV Healesville and the inclusion of some truly questionable picks leaves me scratching my head. It reads like a list built by people who really want you to know they’ve played a lot of golf, just maybe not all the right courses.

4. The Golf Travel Agency
I appreciate the honesty that comes with a list built from personal experience rather than a committee room. That said, the New South Wales lean is hard to ignore. Maybe I’m just showing my own Victoria bias. Or maybe we’re both right. Either way, some omissions are glaring, though I’ll forgive them because there’s only so much golf one person can play in a calendar year.

Wouldn’t be an Australian Golf Ranking blog without an image of a Kangaroo or two on a golf course…

3. Golf Australia
This one delivers a thorough ranking from 1 to 100, with the odd hint of bias depending on where you're standing. Overall, it’s a well-constructed list that seems to take its job seriously. No major quarrels, which is both a compliment and a criticism.

2. Top100 Golf Courses
A reliable go-to, not so much for the rankings themselves but for the accompanying course data and photography. Solid in structure, although once you get past course number 70, the list starts to look suspiciously like someone just typed out names in no particular order. Maybe 100 is too many for this country?

1. Golf Course Guide – Public Courses Version
An exercise in restraint, this list benefits from the notable absence of private clubs. Without the shadow of the usual suspects, it offers some breathing room for lesser-known gems to shine. Most of the top 100 feel like they’re in the right postcode. A rare example of rankings done right, possibly because half the usual politics were left out.

Have I missed one? Almost certainly. Somewhere out there, someone has built a Google Doc with 74 conditional formatting cells and a pivot table built around bunker maintenance and the availability vege options at the halfway house. And if they send it to me, I’ll probably read every word.

Because that’s who we are.

Happy Golfing!
Nick.